Losowe angielskie dowcipy
Why Legs? ->
Q: Why do blondes have legs? A1: So they don't get stuck to the ground. A2: To get between the bedroom and the kitchen. A3: So they don't leave trails, like little snails.... [ca³y ->]
The new father! ->
A doctor was holding a new baby that he had just delivered. The baby looked up at him and said, "Are you my father?" The doctor said, "No, I am the doctor that delivered you." Then the doctor handed the baby to the nurse. While the nurse wa... [ca³y ->]
Little Johnny ->
And then there's little Johnny who one night woke up to go the bathroom and passed by his parents door. Noticing that the door was open a bit, he walked in only to see his mother performing oral sex on his dad. Upon seeing this, little Johnny w... [ca³y ->]
Super-Duper One-Liners! ->
Here's a little bit-a-dis and a little bit-a-dat: How can you tell the Irish guy in the hospital? He's the one blowing the foam off of his bedpan. =========================== Why don't Italians have acne? It slides off. ====================... [ca³y ->]
Blonde quickies 121-140 ->
121. Q: What's the difference between a blonde and a limousine? A: Not everybody has been in a limo. 122. Q: What's the difference between a blonde track team and a tribe of sly pygmies? A: One's a bunch a cunning runts ... 123 Q: What'... [ca³y ->]
Paradox of Men ->
If you can't go down on them, you're not a good partner. If you can go down on them, they are jeolous that someone taught you how. If they pay for dinner, you are using them. If you pay for dinner, you are trying to embarrass them. If you... [ca³y ->]
The Adoption ->
Billie and Tillie were delighted when finally their long wait to adopt a baby came to an end. The adoption center called and told them they had a wonderful Russian baby boy and the couple took him without hesitation. On the way home from the adopt... [ca³y ->]
Why did the condom fly across the road? ->
Why did the condom fly across the road? -It was pissed off!!... [ca³y ->]
Black Jokes... ->
How do you stop a 3 black men from raping a white woman? Throw them a basketball! What do you call a black priest? Holy Shit! What do you call a black woman taking birth control pills? A Humanitarian.... [ca³y ->]
Traveling Saleman. ->
Mr. Jones, upon returning from a business trip was shocked to find his wife in bed with a stranger. The nude stranger was sprawled over the bed asleep. "You rotten bastard!" yelled the husband..."I'm going to kill you!" "Wait!, said Mrs. Jones"... [ca³y ->]
Redneck Bonanza! ->
Q: What do a redneck divorce and a tornado have in common? A: Either way somebody loses a trailer home! You know you're a redneck if your wife wants to take a bath but you have to move the transmision from the tub first. You know you're a red ... [ca³y ->]
Dog with one eye ->
Two blondes were walking down the road and the first blonde said "Look at that dog with one eye!" The other blonde covers one of her eyes and goes, "Why?"... [ca³y ->]
Some cute want-ads! ->
The following were actually taken from classified ads in newspapers: 1 MAN, 7 WOMAN HOT TUB -- $850/offer COWS, CALVES NEVER BRED... ALSO 1 GAY BULL FOR SALE. FREE PUPPIES: PART COCKER SPANIEL - PART SNEAKY NEIGHBOR'S DOG GERMAN SHEPHE... [ca³y ->]
Inventions By Blondes ->
-- The water-proof towel -- Glow in the dark sunglasses -- Solar powered flashlights -- Submarine screen doors -- A book on how to read -- Inflatable dart boards -- A dictionary index -- Mechanical Pencil sharpeners -- Powdered water -- Peda... [ca³y ->]
Lunatic & his dog ->
A doctor came to the mental hospital to visit his patients. In one of the rooms, he saw a man walking around, dragging a toothbrush on a leash. The doctor asked the man: "What are you doing, walking the dog?" The man replied: "Oh no, I'm just dra... [ca³y ->]